RSE Equestrian Blog

A Mindful Death

  • By RSE Guest Blogger
  • 1 comment

A Mindful Death

THROUGHOUT MY LIFE, I'VE ALWAYS FELT THE NEED TO HELP PEOPLE - BUT I COULDNT FIND WHAT MY PASSION WAS... 

I had been a “slave” of sorts to the call center world for 17 years, and I certainly wasn’t happy doing that.  The job had no meaning, no purpose, and my mental health was suffering because of it.  I knew if I wanted to be happy again, something was going to have to give, I needed to make a change.  I didn’t realize at that time that my life would change so much that I would be able to quit the call center job that made me so miserable, and pursue a passion of helping people, in a meaningful way!

AN ELDERLY WOMAN APPROACHED ME SAYING; WHAT ABOUT PEOPLE WHO ARE DYING?  THEY NEED SUPPORT TOO...

A couple of years ago I had been trained as a birth doula but had never practiced as the opportunity hadn’t presented itself to me. (A birth doula is someone who emotionally supports and empowers a pregnant woman while she’s going through the labour and birth process). Then a conversation with an elderly lady happened. My partner had this feeling that I had to meet her friend, she didn’t know why she just knew I had to. We arranged to meet for tea, and we ended up having a conversation about my being a birth doula. She thought it was great that I was going to be doing that, but then, she posed a question to me… What about people who are dying? They need support too.  Then it clicked!  I finally knew what I was going to do “when I grow up”! That afternoon tea and conversation led me down the rabbit hole of the internet to find training that I could do to become someone who could be with the dying and their families.   I found the course for which I was looking and wasn’t disappointed.  It was an in-depth course about community deathcare that would change my life’s purpose as I had never thought it would.

The course prepared me to be what I would later find out was a death doula. A death doula is simply a person who helps and supports the dying and their families through the dying and death process. It is a non-medical role where death doulas can provide a variety of services such as sitting with the dying and reading to them or having a conversation with them. Sometimes when people are dying, they want to talk about it and express their feelings. Some family members may have a difficult time communicating with their dying loved ones about the fact that they are dying.  A death doula can hold a safe space for them to talk about their thoughts and feelings on death and dying.

EVERYTHING LINED UP PERFECTLY...

A long story short, everything lined up perfectly, and I was finally able to quit the job that caused me so much unhappiness and founded A Mindful Death Doula Services! I provide the knowledge, tools, and education that most of us are lacking when it comes to community deathcare.  I provide services such as advance planning for Medical Health Care Directives, bed-side vigils, non-medical respite care, guidance in after deathcare, as well as guidance with planning a home funeral. What we know as ‘traditional’ funerals aren’t traditional at all.  The art of the way we used to care for our dying and dead has been lost through the generations due to the advent of embalming and handing our loved ones over to the ‘professionals.’ It’s my pleasure to work with families in making the death of their loved one beautiful, by bringing deathcare back home and in our communities, where it belongs.

Being a death doula has me thinking about death and dying (in a very healthy way) all day long, so for me, it’s natural to talk about it a lot. One day, I was having a conversation with my partner about my business, and the conversation turned in to a brainstorming session about what other services I could provide.  Being crazy animals lovers, we brought up the subject of pets…why had I not thought about that before? (Between two households, we have ten cats and two dogs!). So, down the rabbit hole of the internet, I went again, searching for things about pet funerals and green pet deathcare options.  I discovered that there aren’t a lot of businesses out there that provide green pet deathcare, so I thought about it.  I realized that what we do for our human family members when they die, can be modified and went on to create The Green Pet Funeral & Memory Box.  The kit comes in an unfinished wood box, a biodegradable shroud, along with other items to help people honour their pets through the dying and death process.  

I invite you to read about pet funerals and consider honouring members of your pet family with a pet funeral, I promise you won’t regret it.

Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened.

-Anatole France

 

 


WHO IS JULES JONES?

Jules Jones is originally from Hamilton, Ontario, and now resides in New Brunswick. She is the mother of twin girls and has a background in banking and business administration. After being in the corporate world for many years, Jules realized that she needed something more fulfilling and meaningful.  She has always had a passion for helping people, so she decided to become involved with the Community Deathcare movement and studied with the Beyond Yonder Virtual School for Community Deathcaring Canada to become a Death Doula and Death Educator.

Jules brings the tradition of caring for our dying and dead loved ones back to our communities and to modern times. She is very passionate about supporting families and their loved ones through their sacred transition into death by protecting and holding space for them.

Share this
Older Post Newer Post